Post Abortion Syndrome (PAS)

To understand Post Abortion Syndrome (PAS), one must first understand Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) - victims of PTSD are said to have "experienced, witnessed, or were confronted with an event or events that involved actual or threatened death or serious injury, or a threat to the physical integrity of self or others, and the person's response involved intense fear, helplessness, or horror."

This event could be any number of things, including war, rape, witnessing a murder, being a victim of a violent crime, or surviving the devastations of an earthquake or hurricane. For the woman who has had an abortion, it is the act of taking the life of her own unborn child.

While abortion is perceived by our society as being an acceptable option to giving birth, most women, at some deep level of their being, realize that abortion is an act against nature, and must "shut down" any maternal instincts they may have in order to carry through with an abortion. After the abortion is over, many women are unable to reconcile the fact that they were responsible for the death of their child, and struggle for years with unresolved feelings of guilt and grief.

These women usually struggle with their grief in isolation, and rarely feel free to discuss their abortion experiences with others for fear that they will be condemned or abandoned by those close to them. While many women around the world are suffering from PAS, most believe that they are alone in their pain - that their negative experience with abortion is unusual or unique - thus compounding their feelings of loneliness and isolation.

When a woman does seek help, or attempts to talk to her friends and family about her experience, she is often met with resistance and a lack of understanding. Counselors, abortion providers, doctors and peers may all tell the woman that she needs to put her experience behind her, or get on with her life.

However well meaning their advice may be, a woman struggling with negative feelings after an abortion will find that her feelings will not disappear no matter how hard she tries to forget them. Rather, they often lead to a dysfunctional life style. The woman will simply go on with her life never knowing how to overcome the negative, self-destructive behaviors that become a way of life for victims of PTSD.

Some of these behaviors include:

• despair/helplessness/hopelessness
• unhealthy/abusive relationships
• sexual dysfunction
• depression
• low self-esteem
• guilt and/or shame
• drug and/or alcohol abuse
• frequent bouts of crying
• anorexia/bulimia
• nightmares
• suicidal thoughts, threats and attempts and/or a preoccupation with death

There are other women who feel that they have not been affected at all by their abortion(s), and are unable to see the connection between other problems in their life, and their abortion experience(s). They have probably learned to cope with their feelings, usually by using "defense mechanisms (denial, repression, suppression, compensatory pregnancy and/or reaction formation).

This information is designed to help you, the woman who has had an abortion, decide for yourself whether or not you need to receive healing from your experience. As you continue reading, keep in mind that any "defense mechanisms" you may have been using to cope with your abortion(s) may still be firmly in place. Be honest with yourself as you answer the following questions.

"To forget the past too soon - in an effort to bury it beyond memory - is most certainly to risk the inevitability of its reappearing in later life in an even more frightening and painful way."

Michael Mannion

Do you try to "turn off" any feelings connected to your abortion/s, perhaps telling yourself to "forget about it and get on with life?"

Do you find yourself becoming physically or emotionally tense and/or anxious when the subject of abortion comes up?

Do you avoid being exposed to the subject of abortion? Do you change the subject in conversations when abortion comes up? Do you change the radio/television channel when abortion is being discussed?

Do you find yourself "tuning out" when abortion is being discussed, and you can't "run away," such as during a church service or Bible study?

Do physical reminders of your abortion, such as babies, pregnant women, or baby clothes, cause you distress? Do you have a hard time feeling happy for friends or family members who are pregnant? Do you feel uncomfortable around small children, especially infants?

Do you become depressed/anxious/sick around the anniversary date of the abortion, or on the projected due date of the aborted baby?

Do you have difficulty in relationships? Do you find yourself choosing relationships that are unhealthy and/or abusive? Do you find yourself sabotaging healthy relationships?

Are you unable to be vulnerable? Do you find yourself keeping people at a "safe" distance? Do you always feel that you're an "observer" rather than a "participant" in a group?

Have you isolated yourself since your abortion? Have you lost interest in activities that were important to you before your abortion?

If you were going to school, did your grades drop after the abortion? If you had a career, did you find yourself sabotaging your success?

Since your abortion, have you used drugs or alcohol as a way to "medicate" your emotional pain? Do you have an eating disorder? Do you struggle with longs bouts of depression?

Have you thought of, or attempted, suicide? Do you struggle with self-destructive behaviors?

Are you afraid to share your abortion experience with others, especially with significant people in your life? Are you afraid of being rejected or judged?

If you don't have children, do you fear that you won't ever be able to get pregnant again? Are you afraid that you won't be able to have a normal, healthy baby? Or, do you find yourself feeling "turned off" by the thought of ever having children? Do you feel unworthy of being a mother?

If you have children now, do you find yourself smothering them with love and affection? Do you overprotect them? Are you frequently concerned for their safety? Do you have difficulty leaving them with a baby sitter?

Do you struggle with feelings of anger and/or rage? Are you irritable and "on edge?" Do you find yourself lashing out at people, especially men and children?

If you answered "yes" to most or many of these questions, you probably do need healing from your abortion.

Please click here and fill out this worksheet for assistance
 

"If she is net seen as much worth in her own eyes, how could the child within her be seen as worth any more? The destruction of her unborn child is but another side of her own self-destructive feelings."

Michael Mannion

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Some Testimonies

"I have few words that adequately express the way GOD moved in my life last weekend. Thanks so much for your kindness! I sort of feel like a prisoner released from prison and not quite sure what to do with all this freedom! I will support your ministry in prayer always, and I will never, ever forget you or your ministry!"
- C.C.

"I just wanted to send you a big THANK YOU! THANKS for taking the time to help us with our pain. I can't begin to tell you how that weekend changed me. I have had one great week - I don't hate myself anymore! I've found a church, and I can't wait to learn more of God's word and what He has to say to me and to teach me. You've made a difference in my life!"
- S.

"No other experience I've ever had has touched me the way the past weekend has. In the first few days I felt renewed and such hope. I saw a new side of myself and my future. Now, just 4 days later I am settling into sadness - but you know - I see it so much more clearly now. It's OK! I know where it's coming from and in a vew strange way it's exciting because I know the journey of healing is starting in me. How can I thank you for this gift of hope? For a new start? For introducing me to my precious baby in heaven? Your work in this are is such a gift from God and I will never stop thanking Him for Silent Voices."
- D.W.

"Thank you so much for your ministry in helping women heal from their pawn from abortion. I am grateful for your time and your gentl spirit during my healing process. Your dedication is a blessing for so many. I am certain that the Lord is pleased in the way you draw women closer to Him. What a wonderful opportunity for you to bring people to a personal relationship with Christ!"
- K.S.

"I wanted to write you and let you know how very thankful I am for the workshop I attended a few weeks ago. In my 6 years as a Christian I must say I've never felt so blessed and so much healing! I feel so much closer and stronger in my walk with the Lord than I ever have before. My marriage is getting stronger each and every day. We are finally talking for the first time in our relationship and falling in love for the first time. I jsut cry some days with the great joy in my heart at how God used that weekend!!"
- B.T.

"I can't begin to thank you for last weekend. It has been life changing for me. I'm not sure exactly how God did it, but I know He used you in a mighty way to accomplish taht. I do feel His love daily. I even stopped taking my medication because I feel the confidence now to truly trust Him when sad feelings come and I get that hopeless feeling. I'm so grateful that God used you as a vessel in part of my healing!"
- G.V.

"I know this has been a long time coming buy my heart just can't thank you enough for the Post Abortion workshop you gave recently. Even to this day I am still growing from it - since I've had some time and distance I feel the scriptures we focused on and studied are finally beginning to take root in a deeper way. I've finally begun believing God has forgiven me for this - something I've struggled with for so long - and also I'm beginning to let God just love me for who I am for the first time in my life. I never felt worthy but God's been wearing me down and I've finally prayed I want to receive all He has for me. I've learned this and so much more about putting my past into perspective and am now seeing good come out of it, just as He promises. You have been used significantly to help me in my healing and I know I have a ways to go but I'm willing and not afraid anymore. I'm also willing now to help others - in God's way and in His timing."
- M.B.

"I would just like to share a few things with you that have happened since the workshop and say thank you! The workshop allowed me to work through my feelings and guilt. I can honestly say for the first time the guilt I used to carry around is gone. There has been such a feeling of peace between me and the Lord. I had struggled for so long that I didn't see the full extent of the burden I carried. Now, I have been able to experience what I knew was true - I am forgiven! I have also been able to trust in the Lord and share my abortion experience with a few close friends. I would have never allowed myself to be this vulnerable before. I did not receive condemnation from these people, but instead saw even more of Gopd's love. I would have never been able to open up like this in the past or fear of judgement. The Lord prepared me for the workshop and promised me a life changing weekend - and He delivered! I am still amazed by His timing in it all."
- K.W.

If you would like to correspond by email with someone who has attended one of our groups, please click here.

Please click here and fill out this worksheet for assistance